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woman lying on her bed contemplating life

Life Didn’t Turn Out As I Expected – And?

Do you sometimes find yourself hearing about the success of others and swallowing back your bitterness?

It could have been me, you think. If only this or that. You know in your heart that you are just as good as the girl on the TV or your colleague who has been promoted to become your manager. But you feel that life hasn’t treated you fairly. You didn’t get the chance you deserved. You have been unlucky. The universe didn’t deliver on your wishes. Whatever it is, you’ve got the perfect excuse for it. It’s not your fault if life didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to, right?

You need to stop before bitterness makes you sour and angry. Forget about how well others are doing. It doesn’t matter. What matters is how you are and how you’re getting along with your life. You know that feeling when things didn’t go the way you planned? Here is why you need to forget about it:

A midlife crisis is realising that what you hoped for doesn’t happen unless you work for it

Unless you’re fortunate enough to count a fairy godmother among your relatives, it’s fair to say that nothing is going to magically materialise in your life unless you work towards it. If you suddenly realise you are not where you want to be, what is stopping you from taking specific measures about it? If you’ve been longing for a new and better job, maybe the best way to get it is not to blame life, but to go back to school. You’ve been trying to lose weight in vain on a bogus diet found online? No, your genes are not working against you. You just need a professional to help you, like a personal trainer or even online coaching if you don’t fancy the gym. The bottom line is that you are the one in charge.

You can’t order your perfect life online

Accept it: Not everything in life will be happy. Things will not always follow the path you were hoping for. Life is, after all, a roller coaster. But if you want to make sure that your lows don’t stay low, you need to work on your perspective. Being unable to find different options or get on with new situations is precisely what makes you unhappy. Things will go wrong from time to time. But when one door shuts, it doesn’t mean that you have to stand in front of it and sulk. Find another door. Find another way through or try something completely different.

No, the universe doesn’t owe you anything

You hear it all the time. People get angry at the universe, life, or even god when they feel they have not received what they wanted. Life, believe it or not, is not a Christmas presents list. Just because you want something to happen, it doesn’t mean it will. And similarly, just because you really don’t want something to happen, it doesn’t mean it won’t. Unfortunately, nobody is entitled to anything in life.

It’s time you stop blaming someone else or something else for preventing you from achieving your goals. You live in a country and in an age where you have free will, rights, and complete freedom. Nothing is stopping you from being what you want, and when obstacles stand in your way, dealing with them is the only way forward.

Photo by Kinga Cichewicz on Unsplash

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